‘I usually think: wonderful, I enjoy this, this is who I am’

“Just carry on. Getting the best out of myself. Do not give up. That motivation runs deep within me. I wouldn’t say it was because of my adoption, but it certainly played a role in my development. I was born in South Korea. I came to the Netherlands as a baby of less than six months. I was about four years old when I started judo. My parents thought: it is useful if this vulnerable girl can stand up for herself and defend herself. The judo school in Oegstgeest became a second home.

“Already at a fairly young age, around the age of six, I realized that I was an adopted child. I grew up with an older sister and brother and a younger brother. They are biological children of our parents. In my upbringing I didn’t notice any difference between them and me. But apparently I have a sensitively tuned antenna. Even as a child I often thought: I will not be the adopted outsider who lags behind in learning and performance. I didn’t want to live up to that cliché image.

“Judo has played an important role in my life for over thirty years. I stopped temporarily twice, when I was pregnant with our son and daughter. I also skipped a year after my father passed away in 2009. He was my great supporter. He didn’t miss any of my games. He was always there, at home and abroad, even when I was an adult.

“Judo without him – for a while I couldn’t afford it. Fortunately, my energy slowly returned. I thought: I’m going to see how far I can get in the veteran circuit. In judo you become a veteran at an early age; it is a sport that demands a lot from you.

“I can now say: I have come far. You can’t go any higher, even. Last November I became world champion in my weight class in Abu Dhabi. I had won silver and bronze before, at European championships. Not bad – but I go for gold in everything I do, so I had not yet achieved my ultimate goal.

“For a long time I thought: once I became world champion, I would call it a day at this highest level. But the day after my victory I already thought: there, that was that – and now on to the next big tournament.

“No, we didn’t have a party when I came home with that gold medal. My eldest brother brought a bouquet of flowers. I had a cake with my first judo teacher, with whom I have a strong bond. That was festive enough. I haven’t heard anything from the judo association. I thought that was a bit strange – but hey, I don’t do this for the congratulations and compliments after all.

“As a child and young person I played in the Dutch top, but I deliberately did not participate in the really big tournaments. I had another passion at that time: playing the violin. My parents were wise enough to say: school comes before sports. I agreed. No one will ever become rich from a professional career in judo. The risk of injuries is also quite high.

“No one will ever become rich from a professional career in judo”

“I did the Academy of Physical Education. I was a gym teacher. I was trained as a coach to provide resilience training to children. Body language is very important in this.

“Life can be really difficult for children who are different from others. I know this from experience, because of my Asian appearance. Still today, when I walk on the street, I occasionally encounter annoying young people who shout strange things at me. Babble, a list of dishes from the Chinese menu. Laugh… And then run or cycle away.

“Supposedly this is an innocent, childish form of discrimination. But it does get under your skin. I feel Dutch in everything I am and do. Yet there are still times when I am pushed into the role of so-called ‘not normal’. This requires a way of responding, of resilience, which I also try to pass on to my children.

“The drive to achieve is in me, but whether it comes from a deep-rooted feeling of deprivation – no, I don’t think so. To find out, I would like to study psychology. I don’t have time for that at the moment. My family is number one now. My husband and I especially want to be good parents.

“A few years ago I thought: I want to play the piano. I taught myself to do it, up to a certain level – and then I decided: it would take too much time and effort to get even better, so I’ll leave it at that.

“At the international tournaments I met an Italian judoka, who has become a good friend of mine. I understand her fine, but I can’t say much back in Italian. That is why I have now started an Italian course.

“I’m always busy. I’m always on, so to speak. There are moments when I think: why? Huh, no… – especially when the alarm goes off at a quarter past six, so I can do an hour of strength training in the gym before taking the kids to school. But more often I think: this is wonderful, I enjoy this, this is who I am.”

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